Welcome. For a while now I’ve been considering sharing this piece. It is a chapter in what will be my next book.

This chapter flowed through me. I didn’t need to think, it just arrived in my mind, I sat down, and it poured onto the page.

My favourite chapters are those that flow through me like this, and if you really understand the words I am sharing, it is one of the most important pieces yet.

Thank you for reading, beautiful soul 🙏🏼

I AM

For four years my journalling practice consisted of free writing, gratitude, affirmations, and intentional creation. Meaning, that my journaling practice was an avenue for manifesting what I was desiring in my life at those times.

I would ask myself what I wanted, how it would feel, then appreciate all the ways in which those feelings were already present in my life in other ways, in other areas of my life.

It was a beautiful practice, and it was a way for me to intentionally put myself in a state of joy, love, and abundance, in alignment with what I wanted to call in. I would intentionally influence my emotional state daily to be high vibe.

I loved it, and it was needed throughout my time of healing, but my intention behind this type of journaling wasn’t just to be in joy. It was more often an attempt to create more, manifest more, more money, more clients, just more.

Not often did I take time to truly, deeply appreciate all I was creating along the way, even though gratitude was a part of my daily practice, and still is.

In my practice of creating more, there were underlying feelings of not already having or being enough, although mostly I was unaware of them.

My affirmations were always followed with uplifting, beautiful words, pulling myself towards the woman I wanted to be, or more accurately, how I wanted to feel as that woman.

“I am powerful”

“I am successful”

“I am abundant”

“I am wealthy”

“I am a six-figure coach”

They were all an attempt to pull me from a place I was avoiding, and more so, an attempt to propel myself towards success and abundance.

It wasn’t that I was bypassing anything, as you’ll know if you’ve read Becoming Her, but I was reaching for more. More of what? What was behind my desire for success and abundance?

Something was missing. Something that was buried beneath the surface. A belief of needing to be successful to be worthy? A need to be accepted and acknowledged in my attempt to fill a void of feeling inadequate? A deep fear of being rejected by the one person I was needing more love from growing up… my dad?

Honestly, all of these things.

No amount of success or wealth could help me feel the love I craved, the love that was ever-present but untapped within me. A love that I had not yet surrendered to.

Wealth, success, abundance, were all available to me, but my intention for creating them was skewed and misaligned by my unmet needs and drive to be seen.

Repetition is one way to change your subconscious. And so, repeating affirmations is not a bad thing, but when they’re not harmonised with the subconscious beliefs and emotions, they are in friction, in resistance to the underlying, which evidently, make them somewhat powerless.

Our emotions hold more power than our words. The emotions held, the pains, need to be met, received, and loved first, to create any kind of leap forward.

And yet, when you do release these, you feel a deep contentment, and you no longer feel that deep yearning for more. Because that emotional need that was not met, that has you craving more money or success to be accepted and loved, is no longer present.

And yet, this is exactly what is needed to detach and allow. A surrender to what is and what is on its way.

After being unwell, and making the choice to surrender to love, surrender to it all, surrender and detach from needing more, I noticed a shift in my journalling practice.

Instead of going in with the intention to manifest more, instead of my “I am” being followed with success or abundance or wealth, I began writing simply…

“I am” and “It is”.

I no longer felt called to write anything following these words, it almost felt untrue to write anything more. In a way, it was untrue. IT was already. I was. I am.

I had reached a deep level of peace within myself. I was letting go of all attachments more easily. I was letting go of little upsets and living in complete trust and surrender.

I would practice gratitude and I would free write and then I would simply write at the bottom of my page, “it is” and “I am”.

I am not more, I am not less. I am not light, I am not dark. I am not happy, I am not sad. I am not anything, but I am. I am all of this, and yet I am none of this. It’s simply, I am.

Bliss is a frequency you hold when you are living in alignment. It’s not needing to fix, escape, create more, or be more. It already is.

I felt this before I created “success”, in whatever that word means in the material realm. I felt this before I created wealth. I simply felt bliss when I finally started living in alignment and I surrendered to anything else coming into my material existence. I didn’t need more, I was it. I didn’t crave more, I already was.

I am. It was a surrender to what was, a trust beyond control, a letting go of the little things, a giggle at my erratic mind, and a love within myself that was impenetrable. That love was beyond self-love, it was just love. It was. It is. I am.

To be honest, I’d never quite felt this way. I’d experienced bliss states, but they were fleeting. I’d reach what I was wanting, then I’d almost instantly want more.

This was a knowing that everything I’d been working on and for, was done, although I couldn’t yet see it with my eyes. Even more so, a letting go of needing it and desiring it. It was done but even if it wasn’t, I am.

I had visions of a property, surrounded by trees, an open safe space for community, creativity, and love. A space I had created alongside my love. I had visions of this, of us, before we even met.

It was my big vision for what was to be created. But instead of my actions all being driven towards this and “needing” it now, which was all I’d felt in the past, I could see with clarity that it already existed.

I could see it so clearly, and I could feel it so deeply, that I knew it already existed in another timeline. And I knew that timeline was one that my love and I weren’t far from stepping into.

I also felt so content with what was, that it no longer mattered if we physically created it or not.

The feelings I knew it would bring, I felt them now. The love I wanted to cultivate, was already present. I did not need. I already was.

No longer driven by an unfulfilled need or desire. No longer needing to create more from a place of lack and driven by “ego”. I was driven only by love, which, as I said, was ever-present and untapped. Except now no longer untapped. It is and I am.

This allowed. This allowed creativity to flow. This allowed further feelings of alignment and intention to only live in alignment. This allowed a deeper awareness of what was and was not for my greater good. A letting go of fear, and a surrender to love and trust.

In my slowing down, I no longer needed to feel better, because no matter what I felt it was all sensation. When you become comfortable with the uncomfortable, it is just another sensation. What is uncomfortable anymore? It just is.

I was not needing to fix anything, nor fix myself. I was not needing to do more, nor be more, no longer looking at myself as a project to be completed.

I became comfortable with all of life, embraced all of life, because it all has purpose, beauty, divinity.

I am all that I am. I am all that I think I am, yet I am beyond all that I think I am. I just am.

I am. It is.

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I am.

Welcome. For a while now I’ve been considering sharing this piece. It is a chapter in what will be my next book.

This chapter flowed through me. I didn’t need to think, it just arrived in my mind, I sat down, and it poured onto the page.

My favourite chapters are those that flow through me like this, and if you really understand the words I am sharing, it is one of the most important pieces yet.

Thank you for reading, beautiful soul 🙏🏼

I AMFor four years my journalling practice consisted of free writing, gratitude, affirmations, and intentional creation. Meaning, that my journaling practice was an avenue for manifesting what I was desiring in my life at those times.

I would ask myself what I wanted, how it would feel, then appreciate all the ways in which those feelings were already present in my life in other ways, in other areas of my life.

It was a beautiful practice, and it was a way for me to intentionally put myself in a state of joy, love, and abundance, in alignment with what I wanted to call in. I would intentionally influence my emotional state daily to be high vibe.

I loved it, and it was needed throughout my time of healing, but my intention behind this type of journaling wasn’t just to be in joy. It was more often an attempt to create more, manifest more, more money, more clients, just more.

Not often did I take time to truly, deeply appreciate all I was creating along the way, even though gratitude was a part of my daily practice, and still is.

In my practice of creating more, there were underlying feelings of not already having or being enough, although mostly I was unaware of them.

My affirmations were always followed with uplifting, beautiful words, pulling myself towards the woman I wanted to be, or more accurately, how I wanted to feel as that woman.

“I am powerful”

“I am successful”

“I am abundant”

“I am wealthy”

“I am a six-figure coach”

They were all an attempt to pull me from a place I was avoiding, and more so, an attempt to propel myself towards success and abundance.

It wasn’t that I was bypassing anything, as you’ll know if you’ve read Becoming Her, but I was reaching for more. More of what? What was behind my desire for success and abundance?

Honestly, all of these things.

No amount of success or wealth could help me feel the love I craved, the love that was ever-present but untapped within me. A love that I had not yet surrendered to.

Wealth, success, abundance, were all available to me, but my intention for creating them was skewed and misaligned by my unmet needs and drive to be seen.

Repetition is one way to change your subconscious. And so, repeating affirmations is not a bad thing, but when they’re not harmonised with the subconscious beliefs and emotions, they are in friction, in resistance to the underlying, which evidently, make them somewhat powerless.

Our emotions hold more power than our words. The emotions held, the pains, need to be met, received, and loved first, to create any kind of leap forward.

And yet, when you do release these, you feel a deep contentment, and you no longer feel that deep yearning for more. Because that emotional need that was not met, that has you craving more money or success to be accepted and loved, is no longer present.

And yet, this is exactly what is needed to detach and allow. A surrender to what is and what is on its way.

After being unwell, and making the choice to surrender to love, surrender to it all, surrender and detach from needing more, I noticed a shift in my journalling practice.

Instead of going in with the intention to manifest more, instead of my “I am” being followed with success or abundance or wealth, I began writing simply…

“I am” and “It is”.

I no longer felt called to write anything following these words, it almost felt untrue to write anything more. In a way, it was untrue. IT was already. I was. I am.

I had reached a deep level of peace within myself. I was letting go of all attachments more easily. I was letting go of little upsets and living in complete trust and surrender.

I would practice gratitude and I would free write and then I would simply write at the bottom of my page, “it is” and “I am”.

I am not more, I am not less. I am not light, I am not dark. I am not happy, I am not sad. I am not anything, but I am. I am all of this, and yet I am none of this. It’s simply, I am.

Bliss is a frequency you hold when you are living in alignment. It’s not needing to fix, escape, create more, or be more. It already is.

I am. It was a surrender to what was, a trust beyond control, a letting go of the little things, a giggle at my erratic mind, and a love within myself that was impenetrable. That love was beyond self-love, it was just love. It was. It is. I am.

To be honest, I’d never quite felt this way. I’d experienced bliss states, but they were fleeting. I’d reach what I was wanting, then I’d almost instantly want more.

This was a knowing that everything I’d been working on and for, was done, although I couldn’t yet see it with my eyes. Even more so, a letting go of needing it and desiring it. It was done but even if it wasn’t, I am.

I had visions of a property, surrounded by trees, an open safe space for community, creativity, and love. A space I had created alongside my love. I had visions of this, of us, before we even met.

It was my big vision for what was to be created. But instead of my actions all being driven towards this and “needing” it now, which was all I’d felt in the past, I could see with clarity that it already existed.

I could see it so clearly, and I could feel it so deeply, that I knew it already existed in another timeline. And I knew that timeline was one that my love and I weren’t far from stepping into.

I also felt so content with what was, that it no longer mattered if we physically created it or not.

The feelings I knew it would bring, I felt them now. The love I wanted to cultivate, was already present. I did not need. I already was.

No longer driven by an unfulfilled need or desire. No longer needing to create more from a place of lack and driven by “ego”. I was driven only by love, which, as I said, was ever-present and untapped. Except now no longer untapped. It is and I am.

This allowed. This allowed creativity to flow. This allowed further feelings of alignment and intention to only live in alignment. This allowed a deeper awareness of what was and was not for my greater good. A letting go of fear, and a surrender to love and trust.

In my slowing down, I no longer needed to feel better, because no matter what I felt it was all sensation. When you become comfortable with the uncomfortable, it is just another sensation. What is uncomfortable anymore? It just is.

I was not needing to fix anything, nor fix myself. I was not needing to do more, nor be more, no longer looking at myself as a project to be completed.

I became comfortable with all of life, embraced all of life, because it all has purpose, beauty, divinity.

I am all that I am. I am all that I think I am, yet I am beyond all that I think I am. I just am.

I am. It is.

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I AM

For four years my journalling practice consisted of free writing, gratitude, affirmations, and intentional creation. Meaning, that my journaling practice was an avenue for manifesting what I was desiring in my life at those times.